Saturday, March 13, 2010

Its been almost a month

I have had a lot going on in my life and I went into hiding. Blogging was not on the top of my too do list although I enjoy this place to express myself.

I am pregnant and due Sept 12th. This pregnancy has come as a TOTAL surprise and has continued to bring surprising results with it. I am happy to be pregnant but the pregnancy has caused its own sets of complications.

1st being the strain on my already strained marriage.

2nd being my schooling as I am a graduate student and this baby's arrival will be smack dab at the beginning of my last year of graduate school.

3rd being the stress on my marriage.

My last child is 5 years old and I had not expected to see another little one in my life anytime soon, but I guess God has a way of giving us what we need not what we want. I love each and every one of my children but the combination of school, family life, and marriage has placed me in a position of stress that I wish I was NOT in. Who wants to be stressed? NO one but there are times in our lives where we find our self in a position that is not very comfortable.

Because of the stresses in my life I feel unsure and uncertain about my future. I am worried about how I will manage a new baby, an internship 3 full days a week, a load of full time classes, family obligations and then the uncertainty of my marriage.

In the end I know I will make it through this. I know this too will pass but I just wish it had been smoother.

On happier news this baby is HEALTHY and perfect per the ultrasound tech but I already knew that lol. Baby has the nick name of Plankton at this time and Plankton is measuring 2-3 days ahead of schedule consistently for the past few weeks. I am looking forward to MOVEMENT! I am pretty sure that in the next 2-3 weeks I should begin to feel movement which will put my mind at ease as well as give me something happy and exciting to look forward to.

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